Thursday, March 16, 2006

Barefoot Hillbilly Britney gets her due (and maybe Hep C)

This is fucking hilarious! Finally this gas-station-bathroom-no-shoes-wearing-hillbilly is getting what was coming to her. Here are my rules about gas stations:

1) Never try their 'impulse item' cheese product
2) Never use the washroom unless the nearest bush and leaf of poision ivy is being used
3) ALWAYS wear shoes

So, a while back, the dumb hick was seen without shoes in gas station bathrooms (see above). That is fucking sick. People mocked her, but it didn't seem to bother her - to the point that she did it repeatedly.

Today, I read in Hollywood Rag that, while in Hawaii, she got out of her car, shoeless as usual and stepped on A HYPODERMIC NEEDLE.

I'm sorry, but that is FUNNY shit. Read on:

Britney Spears had to be rushed to hospital after treading on a hypodermic needle.

The pop babe - who is on holiday in Hawaii - had stepped out of her car without shoes on when she trod on the needle in a parking lot.

The panic-stricken star was taken to Hawaii State Hospital, but tests showed the needle was unused.A source is quoted in Britain's Daily Star newspaper as saying: "Britney is going to be fine. She's got a nasty cut but it's been disinfected and dressed and she's been released from hospital.

"It was more the shock of seeing the needle poking out of her foot - as you can imagine. All sorts of things race through your mind in that situation.The conclusion we would all jump to is that it was discarded by a drug user.

"Britney was distraught but brave."

First of all, how the fuck do you miss a NEEDLE in the parking lot? If I'm walking barefoot ANYWHERE I'm watching the ground for stuff. Often, it's cat barf in my apartment, but I digress. Also, a needle is not small. It's not like a thumb tack. Oh my lord. She's so dumb.

"Distraught but brave." I have a tip: PUT ON SOME FUCKING SHOES you hick dumbass!

I have made my own photo reproduction of what I think it might have looked like:

I hope she gets an incurable disease. Well, at least a new one. I'm sure KFed has given her all the others.

[Source: Hollywood Rag]

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You are too f-ing funny.