The People's Choice Awards 2011

I have been on a business trip and it has really been hampering with my blogging ability. God. Stupid job.

Anyhoo, the People's Choice Awards were on the other night and I watched them (kind of) while blow drying my hair and reading, in my hotel room.

Here are some pics, let's review:

Adam Sandler & Jennifer Aniston:

She is not a joke. She is hot stuff. And I think she might have been slightly drunk because she was all weird when she presented. An award. To Adam Sandler. Who had a black eye. I don't know why I wrote that like that. There's a better look at her outfit below, which I would totally wear and wish I looked like her.

AnnaLyne McCord:

I want to punch her. Really hard.

I don't know if she did anything, but she wore this dress. And her hair looked weird. I vaguely remember her presenting, but also vaguely remember making a mental note to block it out so I didn't punch the TV in the hotel and then have to pay for it.

Ashley Tisdale:

When this girl came on stage I was SO alarmed by her skin tone. And I can't remember who she was with, but the other person looked deathly pale next to her. And the concentration of the bronzer is SO strong on her face. She really needs a new make-up artist. She should try Haus of Color. They're awesome.

Emma Roberts:

It's not that I would call this girl ugly, but I find her features kind of grotesque. I know that's mean, but I really don't find her pretty.

And oh my god, the pallor.

And those shoes are awful. I kind of like the dress but it's so 2010 that I might be sick of it.

Jennifer Aniston:

I mean, can we PLEASE? She is 40-something. RIDICULOUS. It's D&G, it's fab. I didn't love the shiny gold jewelry, it looked a little cheap, but she looked great and the vest fit perfectly and wasn't too slutty and wow.

I still love her.

Jerry O'Connell:

Why?

Johnny Depp:

I was extremely shocked that he showed up. Like, really? It's the PCA...they don't actually mean anything. But it turned out that his daughter loves Taylor Swift, so he got to tell TS that...gotta please the kids (I guess...).

He looks dapper for him.

Kaley Cuoco:

I don't know if she still has a broken leg so this is why she's wearing a wedding gown but that would be the only 'valid' excuse for this dress. Really? It's way too bridal KC.

And that lipstick...heinous. She needs a new stylist. And that photographer needs new eyeballs, all his pics were blurry.

Kate Walsh:

What is she so happy about? It's not like her dress fits. Or doesn't look like my sister's graduation dress from 1990. I dig the pumps though, happy to see pointy pumps coming back in style.

Anyone have a suggestion for a good pump for someone with wide feet? And don't say Aldo, I refuse.

Katy Perry:

So she showed up without Russell Brand...which I'm sure sparked some gossip after the make-up free Twitter pic he posted of her last week, then almost immediately ripped down.

She definitely has her own style, right? Like, it's something else. Very colorful. Annoying, and costumey, but her. And it makes her boobs look a little dumpy...no?

Khloe Kardashian:

I don't know who advised her to color her hair like that, but it's not good. Getting closer to Miss Piggy coloring...

And I have seen her wear that dress in every variation possible...enough already. We get it, you're not super thin. Show your curves.

Kim Kardashian:

So last year she liked one-shoulder dresses. This year she likes updo's and fitted strapless dresses. She certainly picks a formula that works and goes with it. I covet those shoes. I want and need them.

Kristen Stewart:

I watched this speech and I was pleasantly surprised at her. Normally I hear that she's a sullen baby, and she was very well spoken and soft and very thankful. Also, oh my god those legs. So long and slim. Fantastic.

The dress was also fun, but it wasn't beaded on the back and some people I know thinks that makes it look cheap. Ahem.

Leighton Meester:

Brow lift? There's something weird about her face. It looks...different. It might just be that light grey make-up (experts - wanna weigh in?) but her brows look higher than before.

I wonder what's going to happen to all these stars' faces after a few years...aren't they nervous? Because I think I am for them.
Lisa Edelstein:

She won something. not sure what. I don't find that dress overly flattering. It's kind of making her look like a hot dog. Mmm, hot dog. I totally want one now. I haven't eaten yet today and I've been up since 5am, maybe I should get on that.

Mmmm, Lisa Edelstein dog.

Malin Akerman:

I get a no bra vibe from this dress. Something about boob shape in the front. Woo. Just ate a pickle and it was delicious! Ok, sorry. I kind of feel like one could wear this dress to wear tennis and therefore, I do not feel it is appropriate for an awards show. Maybe a necklace would have swayed me. No jewelry?

Love-15

Mila Kunis:

She looked fab. Plus, I just watched Black Swan so I have nothing bad to say about her. But she had a really awkward line before her award...it was about waking up to someone, having someone who makes you laugh and someone who puts you to bed at night...it was a lead in for best talk show host (which Conan O'Brien won - YESSSSSS!) but considering she just broke up with her boyfriend of 7 years, it was weird. Plus, I thought her voice broke and her eyes watered up a bit when she said it.

Awkwaaaarrrrd.
Minka Kelly:

I've seen this girl in many other photos. She's really pretty. This look is not flattering at all to her nose. And her hair looks like mine does when I tie it up so I can shower without washing my hair. Not good.

Her dress really doesn't fit well, the off-the-shoulder thing is not working for her and the whole thing looks like it's barely hanging on. It's that belt that's keeping it there. Also, the pattern is ugly.

Natalie Portman & Ashton Kutcher:

Uh. Who is that guy? He looks like every emo kid with a video blog on YouTube. Brutal. He looks TERRIBLE.

She looks super cute. As I mentioned above, I love anyone and anything to do with Black Swan right now and it looks like she has a little baby bump too, which is adorable. Even with the pregnancy though, I find that dress about 3 inches too long. It's a little matronly at that length. She's too young for that.

Queen Latifa:

She hosted. And she tried. Really hard. But I think they serve food/alcohol at that event or something because no one was paying attention. At one point they did a crane shot from the balcony and it looked like maybe 30% of the seats were filled. I think it was a bust.

Anyhoo. I hated that dress on TV and I hate it even more in real life. That weird pleated satin detail down the side is not appealing at all.
Raven Simone:

Um. Really? While I cannot fault leather pants, because I have been yearning for some for weeks, I feel a need to shun the ruffles. It's not good. It's almost too close to being a costume from Cirque Du Soleil or something. It's really ick. She needs to learn how to dress.
Selena Gomez:

Justin Bieber's girlfriend!!! This past week the 2 were seen canoodling and touching each other's bums! Illegal! She is 18 and he is 16! RAPE! Ok, that's nothing to make jokes about. Anyhoo, she went to the PCA solo and wore the white look on the carpet and the other look on the stage.

I actually don't mind the 2nd look. I mean, her hair is ridiculous in both. Way too voluminous, but the dress is interesting in the 2nd. I like the high-low hem, I like the pattern/color. The shoes are awful, but I give her passing marks for the stage outfit.

The red carpet dress is blah. Boring and white and blah. Give me something I can work with missy!

Taye Diggs:

This outfit actually looked worse ont he stage. Those pants looked much beiger and he really looked like an investment banker in his weekend outfit when he was on the stage. It wasn't good. And please, can you steam out those crotch wrinkles? Blech.

Taylor Swift:

Freshly dumped by Jake Gyllenhall (apparently he didn't love the spotlight on the relationship) she wears the dress from the cover of this month's Vogue.

I think Natalie Portman wore it better on the cover and I hate that Taylor is back to the wispy curls thing. The straight hair was hot. Go to that.

I wonder what kind of bitter post-Gyllenhall lyrics will be on her next album...