Can we all agree...?

There was some positive reaction to my last post, and seeing as I'm still just as lazy, I thought I'd go for it again.

Can we all agree that Amanda Bynes has fantastic, covetable hair? And a much too short (vag level!) skirt - which leads her to look a little bit like a hooker?

Can we all agree that Dakota Fanning is much more refreshing version of a 15 year old than that hag Ali Lohan?
Didn't Dina Lohan learn anything from pimping out her first child at too young an age?
She's too young to be pushing her boobs together like that!!!

Can we all agree that Jessica Simpson is really not fat at all, just delightfully not anorexic? I'm not saying I love pleather leggings, but they sure are better than than those jeans...

Ugh, this idiot again...can we all agree that she is especially annoying to look at? And that her skirt reminds of that body condom scene from 'The Naked Gun'?
I didn't get that joke until years later because I was so young when it came out.

Let's just all agree and get along! Stupid economy dragging everyone down...

New: Can we all agree...?

So, because I've been so AWOL lately and have had no time to post, I wanted to come up with a way to post more efficiently. So while looking at a bunch of pics I had downloaded which were intended for the blog, I kept repeating "can we all agree?" which leads me to this:

Can we all agree Lady Gaga is annoying and we hope no one ever repeats this hair-as-bow-atop-head 'do?

Can we all agree that Chris Evans (of Fantastic 4 fame) is looking very delicious in this picture?

Can we all agree this is possibly one of the most unflattering outfits we've ever seen anyone wear, let alone Jessica Alba?

Can we all agree that Mischa Barton is no longer relevant and has really disgusting clavicles? Also, that she's clearly under dressed considering the woman's actions behind her? Can we also agree her breasts seem to be approximately at waist level?

Can we all agree Joaquin Phoenix's new look makes him look like a serial killer?

Can we all agree that Angelina has been
A) dressing like garbage lately and
B) sporting a very unflattering old lady 'do?

Lindsay Lohan - much, much, much too thin

Because I haven't posted about our Skank Extraordinaire in a while, I thought I should do a round up of her recent (aggressive) weight loss.

At the very top is her in Miami around the new year looking very, very thin and not healthy, except for her bouncy boobies.

Below that, we see her shopping a couple of weeks back in LA, looking ever more bobble-headed than ever, and her hair is looking really terrible, considering she's often seen coming out of salons.

Notice we also see that curly-haired douche guy at her side who seems to always be around right before she goes into rehab or when she gets into trouble. If I didn't already hate him because of his hair and the fact that he wears skinny jeans, I hate him now.

Below we see her in NYC this past weekend with her sister and her mother, shopping. She is alarmingly thin and to defend these photos, her publicist put out some tard statement about her eating 2 full meals recently. What? That is so ridiculous I cannot even believe someone said that. On top of that, her hair is even more disgusting.

Someone needs to help this girl, because cocaine is not a good diet staple. Especially for someone who's been in rehab 3 times in 3 years.

Oy.

Avril Lavigne is an embarrassment to Canada

Not only does she rip music off from legitimately talented people, she dresses like a tool and is generally a moron.

As a Canadian, I renounce her as I have Celine.

I want to punch her so much.

Dear Angie,

THIS is why people are constantly conjecturing whether or not you are going to squeeze out your 13th child.

You wear shapeless garments. Constantly.

I will, however, admit that the color is beautiful. Something I cannot say about her hair. Yeesh.

Someone needs to help Jessica Simpson

Someone needs to do a fashion intervention on Jessica Simpson. She is a foxy, curvy lady and she needs to learn that high-waisted jeans are just not a flattering silhouette on her. Didn’t we learn that here? Oy.

She's so pretty (save for the constantly open mouth and shite falling out of it), she needs to learn how to dress for her body.

Oh la la.

The Golden Globes!

What do I love most? Awards shows. Why? Because people get all gussied up and then we get to judge them! Hurrah!


Apologies for the order, I normally post in alphabetical but for some reason the images wouldn't upload that way. I'm sure it bothers me more than you...if only it could be like my DVD collection...


Let's go for it!


Angelina Jolie:

Obviously, she looks beautiful. Always does. But in all honesty, I find her manner of dressing a bit blah. If it's not black then it's some other neutral. This is the second cloud coloured dress she's worn in 2 weeks...(see below post for Critic's Choice dress). How about some green or something?

Angela Kinsey:

You may recognize Ange here from 'The Office'. She looks super thinnified after her baby weight gain. I love when TV shows try to hide pregnancies. It's so obvious. Very nice color, but the hair is a little 90's, non?

Amy Adams:

Was the ball gown really necessary? I don't know, considering the economy and the mood of most of the planet, her dress seems a bit showy. I like the jewelry. Glad to see turquoise is back. Love turquoise.

America Ferrara:

Look at her face. So pretty. Very cute girl. I'm not crazy about the skirt, but I like the top of this dress. I like her muted make-up and her not-too-done hair. Overall, very nicely done.

Amanda Seyfried:

Her facial expression keeps making me giggle. I think this is one of the worst years for f'd up facial expressions on red carpets. You'll see what I mean below. If I were this girl, and people had boasted about walking out of my movie as much as people did, I'm not sure I'd be smiling. But good for her. She was in a crap movie adapted from a musical (because no one has original ideas anymore) and she's keeping her chin up. With a really forced smile, but her chin is up. Hee hee.

Cameron Diaz:

Holy hell. WTF happened to her? What's going on with her hair? Why does it look like she has 8 months worth of roots? Oh my god. It's all so bad. Why does it look like my hair used to when I was 4 and had been playing outside all day? She looks like she just hot-boxed her limo!

Also, I hate the dress. Too structured, too taffeta, too pink. We get it, you looked good in pink once. Try something else. Also, don't wear that lipstick with that and for the love of all things holy, go see a hair stylist STAT.

Brooke Burke:

From not done hair on Cam the Man, to overly done Miss America hair on Brooke Burke. It looks like it might have it's own pulse...I'm scared. Hold me. Is it just me or are her nostrils really big? They frighten me.

I'd be upset with her kids if I were her. Why'd they go and cut up her dress right before the GG's? Look how she had to tie it up and walk around all night!

Blake Lively:

Does anyone else want to slap a book atop her noggin and force her to walk around with it? Oh my god the horrid posture! And for a girl with such a great body, that dress is sausaging her reputation. Really not flattering, especially across the abdomen. Ick. Color is very nice though, and I always love her hair.

Anne Hathaway:

When was the last time this girl ate? Her eyes are as big as dinner plates on her giant bobble head. She needs to ingest some Quizno's or something...she's looking way too thin. Unless, maybe Angelina Jolie cursed her last week at the Critic's Choice and her bitch stare is making Anne shrink away...wouldn't surprise me.

Anna Paquin:

So Anna is on this new Vampire show where everyone is constantly having sex and flashing their boobies. She does it at least a couple of times. My husband was watching it but even the boobies couldn't keep him interested, it's that bad. Anyhoo, she looks good. Very conservative hair, very basic dress. I think it's nice, considering most people in that country can't even afford to buy clothes at Wal-Mart. Nice Anna. Points.

Drew Barrymore:

Um. Uh. Did she jam her finger into one of the many sockets surrounding the red carpet? Why is her hair so monstrously huge? Was she in the same limo as Cam? Because she looks a little hot-boxed too. Wow. That is some hair. I saw her last week with the new bleach job, but it didn't do this 'do justice. It looks so dry and icky. Yucka.

The dress is quite lovely, but a bit over the top for the GG's, non? I love her bracelet.

Demi Moore:

Is that stringy, post-shower hair? She looks stunning, as usual, but the hair is a bit odd. I think it's because I'm so used to seeing her with pin-straight shiny hair. this is different, but not bad. I like it. She's pretty. I wish I had $ to have her plastic surgeon. She's looked the same age for almost 20 years. Wow.

Debra Messing:

Very nice. Very retro and glam, and I like her slicked back hair. And her jewelry. Well done. Love that midnight blue color too. So beautiful.

Christina Hendricks:

I have yet to watch this show, but people rave about it (Mad Men). I like the look of this girl, like she wouldn't be a priss and is probably a big ol' bag of fun. I like her just-out-of-bed hair too. It's nice. The dress is not great, but it's black, so you can't really complain.

Christina Applegate:

Try to get a close-up of her face. The make-up is so...there. The eye make-up especially. I normally love her, but I find she looks like a reincarnation of Belle (Beauty and the Beast) in this outfit. Or Cinderella. Either way it's not good.

Evan Rachel Wood:

How to stay relevant after marrying Marilyn Manson: uhhh, uhhh. Not sure. Be in The Wrestler? Nope. Not it. The crying scene was a bit contrived to me...also, she was up against Mickey Rourke and Marisa Tomei. That's tough competish. Either way, love her dress. Love it. The pose can go, but the dress is fab. Hair is simple and the make-up is not spackled on as usual, so it's nice. I also really like that glam case of water behind her.

Eva Mendes:

Imagine you had pasta the night before the awards...wouldn't you wish for a dress like this? Perfect for concealing a tortellini belly! She, as always, looks stunning and I am in love with her necklace. Her hair is a bit messy and the dress is a bit too...constructed, but I still like it. She pulls it off.

Eva Longhoria-Parker:

Wow, I'm so nice for adding the 2nd name. I don't even do that for myself. She looks like she's going to fall over backward. I very much like the scalloping at the bust, but I hate the bottom and that ruins the whole dress. I love that she's wearing less make-up lately and stopped with those gd pin curls all the time. Well done.

Elizabeth Moss:

It took me so long to figure out who this was. Zoey Bartlett! Hurray for West Wing. Apparently now she's on Mad Men. Good for her. Too bad her dress is gross. What's with the shoulders? Imagine the sun was out? What a horrific tan line that would give. The skirt is nice. She should give it to Eva Longhoria.

Elizabeth Banks:

Don't you get the impression that this girl is always out of air? She's constantly heaving and talking as if she's having an asthma attack. She's very pretty, probably the least trashy I've seen her look, but that dress, oh the pinkness of it! It's like cotton candy and it makes me want to barf as much as the carnival does. Yeesh.

January Jones:

I have no clue who this is. She looks unhappy though. Boo hoo! I wonder if it's because her neckline keeps poking her in the eyes. Or she saw the color in daylight. Oh well.

Jane Krakowski:

I don't have much to say. It's a nice dress. Her hair is nice. It's all kind of missing my radar one way or another. You can definitely say that asymmetrical necklines are in this season...

Isla Fisher:
She's so pretty! I'm really not looking forward to 'Confessions of a Shopaholic' because the book was crap, so I imagine the movie will be even more so. But I like her, so I'm happy. Her dress is actually very beautiful, and I'm impressed she's able to pull off those tones with her pale skin tone.
I think I love her.

Hayden Pannetiere:
Ugh. Why do I hate her so? Maybe because Heroes is especially boring and not at all compelling this season and I no longer want to watch it. Maybe because she dresses like a 40 year old. Maybe because I find her and Milo to be a creepy couple.

When you have a straight body like that, why would you choose a column? Why? So unflattering. Why can't she just have fun? She's 20!

Freida Pinto:
This girl is beeeeeeaaaautiful! I love the color of her dress, it's so different. I forget what movie she's in, but I heard she is fantastic in it. I love that she's not a cookie cutter breast implant, nose job blonde. Love it.

Jessica Capshaw:
Is this the offspring of Spielberg and his wife? Who is this girl? I could Google it, but I'm so lazy... Anyhoo, I hate her shoes. Hate. Hate. And her dress! Is she a cocktail waitress? What's going on there? It's halfway between porn actor awards and just trashy club girl. Yikes.

Jennifer Morrison:
Is anyone else gagging now at the thought of seeing satin again for a few months? Damn. It's enough already. Aside from that I'm digging the dress, the color and her genuine-looking smile. Very nice. Her hair kind of looks like a mushroom though, but at least it's not too prom-y.

Jennifer Lopez:
Someone is showing off a little, no? For someone who doesn't really have a good reason to be there, she sure is trying hard. Wouldn't that dress be equally lovely in a dove grey? It's a bit much. She looks like she had a run-in with Goldfinger.

Jennifer Carpenter:
Or should I call her Mrs Dexter? She and Michael C. Hall, who plays Dexter, got married NYE or New Year's Day or something. Does that ick you out too? My husband and I were a little grossed out. They play brother and sister! Hee hee. Oh well. I like her dress, not crazy about her hair, or her razor sharp clavicles that threaten to stab out my eyes if I look for too long. I hope she gets fat after her wedding like I did. Love the facial expression. Hilarious.

Jenna Fischer:
Another great facial expression. "Wha???" Normally she can't dress for shit, but I really, really love this dress. It's lovely. The print is fantastic and the cut is very classic. I like her easy hair and that open mouthed stare too.

Laura Linney:
Love the dress. Love it. Great cut, great flow, beautiful. Could love it more in another, less Easter-y color, but I'll take it. I also like her blow-out. Simple. My favorite thing though, is angry bald guy in the background.

Kate Winslet:
Could she be lovelier? She's just so perty. I love everything about what she's wearing, although I wish she'd stop bleaching her hair so much.

Kate Beckinsale:
I know you all know I love this woman. But that pose! Oh my lord. What for? It's so dramatic. Another one who looks like she's going to keel over backward at any moment. She looks fab though. As much as I hate a mermaid hemline, she does look great. I love the jewelry.

Julie Benz:
She seems to be wearing the gown version of one of my mother's pantsuits from the 80's. The color is exactly the same as my mom's rayon pantsuit and it had the exact same belt. It's uncanny!

I cannot get over how pretty this woman is, and how much make-up they've started putting on her in Dexter. Not to mention her suddenly giant ta-ta's. Did anyone else notice that? She's so pretty, but I find her hair a little too pageant-y here...

Julia Ormond:

I think I've decided that I want to move to Europe. People seem to be beautiful and well-dressed there. Yes, I'm sure there are as many fat fuggo's as there are here, but still. Look how poised and lovely she is? That dress is not especially flattering, because it makes her look like she has the figure of a mother hen (big bod, skinny legs) but it drapes nicely and she's just so pretty. I should get that, it's really making her boobs look huge.

Maria Menounos:
I'm not even really sure if that's her name. Ok, just Googled it and it is! Yay for me. I envy the volume and bounce in her hair. I tried the tips from her Pantene add and I just ended up looking like someone with velcro rollers stuck in their hair.

I'm not sure if I'm crazy about that thwack of bangs she has on the left side of her head (it should have been on the opposite side of the shoulder ruffle), but she looks pretty and I love the dress. Love the color, love the fabric, the ruffle, the pleating. Love.

Maggie Gyllenhall:

Oh Mags, what's your deal? Why must you always be that girl who wears something weird? I'm ok with it, but wouldn't you just like to have a nice black dress on sometimes? Is that blue animal print? Lord. She's odd.

Madeline Zima:
Remember her from 'The Nanny'? Doesn't it make you feel weird now that you saw her breasts on 'Californication'? It makes me feel weird and did while we were watching it. I also did not get the whole "she's so hot" storyline from that show. I don't find her especially beautiful, could just be my personal taste and I'm sure someone will rip me a new asshole in the comments, but I think she's kind of fug.

Speaking of fug, this Peaches & Cream Barbie goes tropical and becomes Guava Barbie is not doing it for me. Any other color would have been lovely. Oh, and a proper hem so it's not dragging all over the place. Guaranteed she and everyone around her was stepping on that all night.

Lisa Rinna:

This woman has an incredibly fit body. It's a little too far on the Madonna-end of the scale for me, but she still looks great. From the neck down. I don't know what the hell she's doing to her face, but she needs to stop. She looks great in photos, but as soon as her face starts moving, back away! Did you see her on Entourage? Wow. That was scary. Also, can we get rid of the 'Billie' haircut already? It's been 15 years.

Lisa Edelstein:
This woman normally has horrific taste, so I'm going to applaud her for not showing up in someone's grandmother's drapes and leave it at that.

Miley Cyrus:
I don't like this girl. I don't know what it is, I just don't like her. Say what you will about me, but I don't think she grew into her face yet. Or if she did...I'm just going to stop talking. Ok, I'm not: What's going on with her mouth!? It looks like someone smacked her with a frying pan while she was making fish faces!

On the other hand, I covet her hair and that absolutely to-die-for dress.

Megan Fox:
Do you ever get the impression that this girl would have no qualms about stealing another girl's boyfriend? She is the kind of girl that doesn't have girlfriends (and she's confirmed this in interviews) because A) she is very stunning and that makes most girls jealous and B) she is not down with the ho code. That's the female version of the bro code.

It didn't bother me as much on JLo, but I find it kind of tacky to wear gold to the Golden Globes. Isn't that a bit cliché?

Also, I don't like her because she got to dry hump my love, Shia LeBoeuf in Transformers. No fair.

Melissa George:
Don't know who this is, so I will be frank: Hate the dress. Hate it. Hate the hair and the pout. PRUUUUUNE.

Mary Louise Parker:
Have you seen Weeds? If not, go buy it and watch it! It's so fantastic and absurd. MLP is the star and she's quite fab. She wears really short, kind of slutty dresses most of the time, but she looks great and has fabulous legs. I really love the front of this dress. That herringbone satin weave does very good things. The color is gorgeous and I love her hair. Fantastic. My fave so far.

Marisa Tomei:
Err. Ahoy matey. What, uh. Well, I think I may be at a loss for words. It's like she stole the puffy shirt from the Seinfeld set and combined it with Sharon Stone's skirt from the Oscar's a million years ago and then swashbuckled some jewelry from someone. Wow. Wowee wow wow.

Rumer Willis:

Love this dress. Love it. Love her pale, pale skin. Hate her hair color. It's a touch too red. She could use an Artec brown shampoo. Love the dress though. LOVE the color.

Rita Wilson:

Does this woman's hair ever change? Seriously! Does she have an investment in mousse? It's so Maria Shriver. Yeesh. I actually enjoy the toned down glitz of her dress and have never noticed her breasts before. Way to go Tom!

Renee Zellwegger:

So I have this magazine on my desk with a tagline from an RZ article "I'm not single - I'm busy!" Wha? WTF is the connection? However, because I hate this woman more than anything, ever, I will not read the article. I just want to express that she sucks and articles about her suck.

Now, let's start to look at her. Take it slow, it's rough. Seriously. The hair - looks as fried as Drew Barrymore's but it's made worse by putting it up and curling it - so it looks like a bird's nest sponsored by L'Oreal hair color. The roots! That dark line right above her forehead. Oh the horrors.

The dress. Uh. I don't even know where to go - it's just so wrong. The shredded turtleneck, the nude body shaper underneath, the sleeve, the skirt. Oh my god. Someone shoot this woman and put her out of her misery. Hey, Dick Cheney's going to be free soon, no?

Penelope Cruz:

I've seen her look better. A lot better. I actually like the dress, but it's not doing anything for her. It's making her look kind of dumpy and she's not. She's curvy and wonderful. It doesn't help that her facial expression seems to be a bit...gassy, but I'm definitely underwhelmed by this.

Olivia Wilde:

That's some severe hair! Yikes. The dress looks like a cupcake threw up on her, but the color is risky, so I'll give her points. I don't like the combination though. The hair is too harsh for the cupcake vomit dress.

Tina Fey:

How does anyone not like this woman? If you don't already watch 30 Rock, get to it. Alec Baldwin is brilliant in it, and Tina Fey is such a breath of fresh air. I think this dress is totally killer and she looks stunning! Love it!

Susan Sarandon:

Love her. The only reason she walks the red carpet is to get in. She doesn't stop and do the bullshit poses and blech, she just walks in. Wearing a suit no less. Love it. And those glorious breasts! Fantastic!

Shaun Robinson:

I want her arms. Dress and hair suck. That is all.

Sandra Bullock:

Wow. She looks like she just ate a jar of lemons. I LOVE her dress and think it would be fantastic for a wedding dress too. Imagine you're getting married in Spain or South America and wearing that. Fantastic. A loose chignon and a flower in your hair. Gorge. I love her bracelets and clutch. Well done Sandy. Now, what the hell are you doing with your career? Is Speed 86 coming out soon?

Salma Hayek:

A lot of white dresses this year, no? I like this one. I like the columb bottom and the thick strapped retro top. It looks a bit long, but she's so pretty it's hard to care. And those chi-chi's! Come on! Fantastic! I want those. At best mine are as big as her cheeks. Boo.