Let's do it:
Kristen/Kirsten Bell:I want to slap this girl so much, that my hand aches when I think of it. It just want to hit her face so badly! I know people are all about her because of Veronica Mars, but I never saw that and I only saw her totally annoying character on Heroes, and for that reason, I hate her.
Almost as much as I hate this pillow case she calls a dress. Oh my god. She should be marching around with a steamer if she intends to wear that. Jesus that's bad.
Angelina Jolie:Yes, yes, we get it. You're exquisite and totally hot. Can you wear a dress that actually fits you? Why does she go around wearing shower curtains? Wear something tight! Make us jealous. And the color makes me sleepy. Boo Angie. Uncool. Hee hee.
Brooke Burke and David Charvet:I only posted this pic because he's wearing a neckerchief. Imagine if he wore one of those on Baywatch back in the day? Wouldn't it have been jauntier? Fantastic.
Malin Ackerman:I think that's her name. Anyhoo, I find her annoying. Her face shape reminds me of Julia Stiles, like that big-as-a-moon round face with the wispy hair. Blech. And color blocking is so last year. Ha ha, I'm Jay Manuel.
Elisha Cuthbert:Not either of the awards shows above-mentioned, but her dress is so ugly that I had to show it. Also the shoes. What are those? Chinese slippers from China-town? Yeesh. She's the worst. The worst!
Kate Beckinsale:Lovely as always, but now that I've seen the GG pictures, I'm thinking it's the same dress in 2 different colors. No? I really like those bangles. My man hands don't fit in bangles though. It's a pity.
Katy Perry:How soon until this ho's 15 seconds is up? You ever notice that 15 seconds last more like 3 years lately? Like, Sanjaya? He has an album coming out and people care? That guy was on American Idol, like, 4 years ago. Come on! Can someone relevant please come around? I'm tired of all the crap! Including this lingerie-inspired, moss green dress. Lord. And what animal is that color?? Don't tell me a Muppet. I'll lose it.
Marisa Tomei:Oh how I wish she'd worn this to the GG's. That necklace is wonderful. Can I have one for saying that? Someone tell me.
Teri Hatcher:I want to punch her! Almost as much as I want to smack K. Bell. Actually more. Let's be honest. Look at her! Her head is tiny and are those shoulder pads in her dress? Ahhhh!
??:I don't know who this is, but I want to congratulate her for being able to pull off this bandage dress. About 4 people can pull it off and it's not normally a nameless person. Plus I like the colors.
Jennifer Morrison:This is a beautiful dress apparently made from the old foil parts of fancy cigarette packages from the 90's. WTF is this? It's horrible and looks like it would sit like a bell if she tried to sit down. Yuck. YUCK YUCK YUCK.
Jennie Garth:This is a lesson on never wearing a skirt that cuts you at the widest part of your calves. It makes you look like you have FAT legs. When you really, really don't. This is bad. So is her hair, for that matter.
Nikki Cox:I want her legs. She can keep that t-shirt she's wearing as a dress, but those legs are fan-tastic. Also, she can keep her face, because someone's been sticking needles into it and it's all F'd up.
Queen Latifa:What is this woman's real name? Anyone? Anyhoo, she looks lovely, as always. I would have very much liked if she could have cut this to knee-length because it's way too much of that irridescent purple otherwise, but what can you do?
Anna-Lyne McCord:I don't know (or care) if I spelled that right. She could have looked good in a bandage dress except it's LOOSE on her. Get her a sandwich. Stat.
Jewel:'Who will sa-a-a-ve your soul?' Remember that song? Remember how she kind of sounded like a frog when she said that? It's was on the verge of being Kermit-y. This dress looks like a hundred Kermits exploded on her white dress. Icky. Icky. My thought and the dress. Ick.
Carrie Underwood:What's going on with her hair? Is it growing out of her ear? She should see someone about that. And for her excessive use of mascara. Come on. You're 13. Not necessary.
Wow. That's a whole lot of tanning product on her legs. Was she wearing a longer dress when she applied and then she settled on this one and forgot to even it out? I find it looks like an older lady's wedding gown when they go to city hall and do it in front of a judge and two random witnesses. With really tanned lower calves.
Why is her dress all dirty? It's totally dirty and gross at the bottom. Yuck. To be honest, I don't hate the top, but I can't be trusted because I totally love disco style and harbor a weakness for it.
Olivia Wilde:
Very wedding dress-y and those shoes look to be very ugly. But I saw this on BCBG.com too and liked it, so I'll give it to her. Still. Shoes are gross.
Very wedding dress-y and those shoes look to be very ugly. But I saw this on BCBG.com too and liked it, so I'll give it to her. Still. Shoes are gross.
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