Tuesday, April 16, 2013

The 2013 MTV Movie Awards Red Carpet

Sorry for the delay, but yesterday it didn't feel right to rib on people for their clothes. RIP those who passed in the Boston Marathon bombing yesterday, my thoughts are with those suffering and their families.

Ok, but I can't be nice all the time. It ruins the mood of what a bitch I normally am. 

Shall we?

Chloe Moretz:
Just Ugh.
While on one hand I am happy that she doesn't look as horrifically slutty as she normally does, I can't condone this hideous patchwork sheath. I also don't really understand whats going on with those shoes. Are those tweed? WTF!?

Jordana Brewster:
Why is she? And no, I am not missing a word, I am really asking why she is a person who we care enough about to see on a red carpet.

And holy unflattering skirt length.

Oh, and holy unflattering forehead and eyebrow combination.

Ke$ha:
Dear god in heaven I hope this isn't Saint Laurent. If they reduced themselves by letting this garbage whore wear their clothes.

Her lipstick is giving me ragey anger. Ugh.

Kerry Washington:
I love this. I don't really get the shoe, but the rest is so spectacular.

Maybe her face is selling the color more than it should, but look at her. OMG. I'm dyin

Kim Kardashian:
Pregnancy doesn't look very good on her. I've never, ever see her look anything but flawless in the make-up department, and she is sweating up a serious storm here. I've never seen her sweat.

And look at her legs. Unfortunately because E! was the only channel in the Dominican Republic, I know that she has psoriasis, but she doesn't look good. 

Except the clothes. I like the clothes. And the necklace. That part is good. The rest does not look great at all.


Kylie Minogue:
It looks like someone sewed this in the limo on the way to the event. Not her best showing ever.

Melanie Iglesias:
Apparently this is/was Vinny's girlfriend from Jersey Shore. Wow. Slutty. I'm not really that surprised. What could we expect? Kate Middleton?

Melissa McCarthy:
I don't agree with her outfits, but I certainly want her shoes and hair.


Selena Gomez:
Not being with Justin Bieber looks good on her.

I don't like the fringe, but the rest is amazing. I wish I had long hair again.

Snooki:
SWEET JESUS.
Her head, her ink, black hair. Her ridiculous fake, puppet teeth.

Oh my god.

Zoe Saldana:
Like Kerry Washington, I die. The simple black tee, the amazing, stunning skirt. The not pointy toe pumps.

This woman consistently knocks it out of the park with clothes. Amazing. I love her style.

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