Ugh, I'm so annoyed by the lack of alphebitization of the photos.
Ok, let's get into it, it's gonna be a long one.
I legit almost wrote 'Angelina Leg'. Every single picture of her for the night had her leg skewed out there like a tripod. It's the worst. We get it, you're edgy, your leg is the size of my arm, yay for you.
It was so unnecessary to show off the slit, it could have been just a subtle hint of leg. Instead it's this. She looks like she rode there on a horse.
Also, she looks kinda scary.
How cute that she was there with Michele Williams. So cute. It's so nice that they're besties and they're going together like that. My husband said to me and Beauty Writer last night that he would let us go together. Mostly because he'd rather die than go to anything like this.
Her earrings were AMAZING. AMAZING.
Her body is insane. This dress is gorgeous. Her face is a mess, her hair is awful, but she works what she's got: an amazing body, a great stylist and plastic surgery.
She should never compare bums with Jennifer Lopez ever again though, that was sad.
This dress is dreamy. So gorge.
Vanity Fair Cam:
I love me some Emma Stone. Like, a lot. But this dress kind of gave me a case of the meh's. The color is gorgeous, amazing and rich and so beautiful, but the bow is so excessive.
I'm also not clear what is going on with her make-up. Is she wearing any? She looks pasty and waxy and I am kind of longing for some blush or something.
This is weird.
God I wish that dress was something else. The color and fabric are divine.
Amazing. Though, I am slightly perplexed at what appear to be stains on her dress. I have to assume they're bedazzlements of some kind.
I super love this. I LOVE IT.
She should look that happy, she looks amazing.
Gwyneth Paltrow:
You know how much I don't love Gwyneth, right? So you know how much this hurts me...This is PERFECTION. It's Tom Ford perfection. My only complaint would be that she shouldn't have put the cuff and the cocktail ring on the same arm.
That is the only fault I can see here.
It was even better later when she took the cape off:
Heidi Klum:
I am so curious as to what is going on at her boob there. SO curious.
The shoulders are a bit much, but what are you going to do when you're wearing Big Bird's molting?
Janet McTeer:
Who now?
Nice looking classy lady. That is all.
So much talk of her nipples. SO MUCH. I love this dress. It's really pretty and lovely and even better than all of that, she didn't bring Casper with her. That is a victory in itself.
She looks amazing in this. It's so perfect on her and on her figure.
And then she changed into the demonic version for the Vanity Fair party. I'm over defined shoulders, but this looks really good too.
She did so well tonight. I'm so happy!
Awwww, cute!
I like his tux. It's a nice, different choice.
Love her ring.
OH MY GOD, look where those cut outs are! It's not normal that she can wear that.
The dress itself is quite tacky...it looks like something that Puff Daddy would wear, but she's so gorge and has such a crazy body that I only hate it a medium amount.
I dunno. I don't get the belt on that dress, but the rest is really lovely. I think she's really beautiful, and it must be so nice to have her sister nominated and wearing an uglier dress.
This is lovely, the idea of it, at least. I love the striations on the skirt, I love the flowers...the belt really turns me off.
What an awkward pose. And how did he hem those pants? With those curtain hemming strips from Ikea?
I love the color of her dress...but the rest of it is icky. It belongs on Penelope Cruz or something...I don't know.
Her skin is crazy though.
Why can't I find a nail polish the color of this hair?
This dress is nice. It's very her. No? It's formal, but spazzy and tacky and young and fun. I don't know...this kind of works for me.
I hate myself for liking their dresses.
Kim has too many bracelets on.
This dress hurts my feelings and simultaneously makes me want to suck on a Werthers original. OMG. Can't get rid of that thought now.
This is very her this season...floaty, pretty, straight to the body. NEUTRAL.
So disappointing. Could have been so much more exciting. I would love to see her in teal...or jewel tone purple.
Maya Rudolph:
It was during her interview with Tim Gunn where he admitted that he was wearing Spanx. It was AMAZING and made my night.
I love this dress. She looks really good in it. And I love the dusty color. It's so pretty. Could have used another bracelet though...no?
Gold for the golden. God I love her.
She knows how to dress for her body, for her age and for her comfort. It's gorgeous and in this shot it looks almost like it's harem pants...as you know, I love me some harem pants...so I'm partial. Hee hee.
Miley Cyrus:
UGH.
Go HOME.
YOU LOOK LIKE AN IDIOT.
That's all.
This dress is so lovely. It's delicate, it's pretty, it's feminine...I'm not a huge fan of red on the red carpet, but this works. something about the polka dots make sit works.
The only thing that's bugging me is that the bust doesn't look like it fits super well...
Also, more importantly, did she do something to her face? She looks marginally different. Something I can't place.
This dress is so amazing. It's so beautiful. The beading is so perfectly placed and the gathers are so flattering. I love the sleeve, I love the higher neck.
So gorgeous on her.
Why? She looks like Christina Aguilera. It's bothering me
It's too neutral.
I don't liiiiiikkkkee this. I really don't like this. It's so blah. For such a vibrant, funny lady, this dress is kind of sleepy.
Aaand, I don't know what's going on with her hair, but I think it's really short and unpleasant. Yucky.
So many people had such high hopes for this girl...she wears daring, stylish clothes. And then these weird boob awnings came. BOOB AWNINGS.
I can't look at this anymore. So disappointing.
Speaking of disappointing...
I'm only posting this because I have to.
Is this from the Bea Arthur collection? NO! Because if it was, I would love it.
It's too big, too long and she has done too much injections around her eyes. For real. she looks completely different.
Is she boyfriend shopping again? Because....this is see-through. Look around her crotch. Um. I am super curious what this looks like from behind. Yikes.
At first glance, I thought maybe this was made of toilet paper. At least the top. I don't really get what is going on up there...maybe the quality isn't high enough so I can't see.
She looks amazing in white. It's stunning on her. I love the stacked bracelets on her right arm (take note Kim) and the purse is a great kick with this white palette.
Where Meryl was the perfect example of lovely gold....this is not so much. I don't care if it's Marchesa, that doesn't make it ok. I don't love the lamé...I find that bow a little unmanageable and her hair is questionable. I don't care what Beauty Writer says...the hair is 1 shade off of perfection. There's something a little budget about Stacey...and it shines through the best designer gowns, the best stylists and the best make-up artists...
This dress, her hair, her earrings: PERFECTION. If not THE best dressed of the night, in my top 3.
What's going on with this girl? Why does her hair look like that?
The dress is quite spectacular, but on that white background, it's so bright and flashy. I'm sure this looked much better in a dark party room.
Her make-up looks messy. The dress is great... wouldn't be surprised if it was hers. So far I'm not getting this casual belt on formal gown trend...perplexing...
How great was this lady in 'Bridesmaids'? She was one of my favourite parts.
This dress, was not my favourite part of last night, but if I'm honest, she barely blipped on my radar until this morning...and she's the last photo after a very long post...so I'm happy.
Despite her hair. Weird.
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