Us Weekly Hot Hollywood Party

Yay! Lots of people got together and wore stuff that we can judge. Let's do this:

Camila Alves:

This is Matthew McConaughey's baby mama. There's something about her face that I don't really like. I don't know if it's the strong brow, or what, but something takes away from her pretty-ness.

Or maybe it's that cheesy-ass dress.

Hayden Panettiere:

Is she for real with those shoes? Gross. I don't like the dress either really, it looks messy. And what is she holding in her hand? So weird.

Jessica Simpson:

She recently made some comment about having a long neck. Um. What? Where?

She looks cute here, like vintage Jessica Simpson but I don't know what's going on with her hair? It looks like a goddam mess.

No, seriously, what long neck?

Jessica Szohr:

Those shoes make me want to kill myself a little. They're so ugly. This girl is obsessed with lace. For the past 3 months she has been wearing lace at every event out there. I'm over it. SO over it!

Lacey Schwimmer:

Can someone please tell me who this bitch is? And why she thinks this jumpsuit is flattering? It's pulling at her hips in a really awkward way that makes me very uncomfortable. Also, look at all those thigh wrinkles. Ew.
Lauren Conrad:

Love the outfit, hate the hair and make-up. For some reason every time this girl does anything but beachy waves she looks terrible. Neck up! Neck down she looks great. I love that outfit. I wish I had an occasion to wear a skirt like that. Though, it doesn't seem super practical...there is no way she can bend over in any way. Imagine she drops something?

Petra Nemcova:

Really?

Tacky.

Rachel Leigh Cook:

Remember this girl? Where the hell has she been? I kind of don't care because if this is what she was waiting to debut then I can wait a bit longer. Ew.

Sara Rue:

We get it. You're skinny. That dress color is highly unflattering. That is all.

Whitney Port:

This girl has the frame to wear a garbage bag and look good. And she normally looks terrible, but I'm kind of impressed right now. I really like this dress.

I kind of want it.