Lindsay Lohan Is FREE As A Coked Out Bird (with Botox)5

THIS is what she wore to court?

Ugh.

Can we please examine her crotchal region?

Also, how short those pants are?

What an awkward length,

Anyway, she was happy because she's finally off 'serious' parole. She is still being told to not break laws (hahahaha, we'll see how long that lasts) but she's free.

Ugh.

I think I might be starting to hate her.

No, for real, what is up with her crotch?

Zooey Deschanel is Amazing! Except........

This girl is the shizzzzzz! (that's right! We're bringing it back) So funny and beautiful and her show, New Girl is hilarious. During a Skankopolis staff meeting, we decided that her side burn fringe needs to go. Don't make us tell you twice, Zooey! Grow them or chop them, you decide. 

Stila's Version of the BB Cream

As predicted, the market is being flooded with beauty balms. Stila claims this is a 10-in-1, (we'll see). I tried it today and I actually loved it. It covers a bit better and the texture isn't nearly as thick as the others I've used. I  took it off a couple of minutes after I put it on and my skin still looked awesome. Well done Stila, well done.

ORANGE ALERT: I Like What Miley Cyrus is Wearing Again

The only reason this is orange and not red is because I know that she has FAR more money than me and I shouldn't be alarmed that she can afford amazing clothes. It's more that I find her attractive if I drink half a box of wine and squint my eyes. That should not be happening.

OMG you guys. WTF?

Also, a Hemsworth wants to marry this moron? Ugh. COME ON.

This dress is stunsville.

I must have it.

ABS - get on it please.

The Hunger Games is HERE!!!!

I am SO excited for this movie. I actually am a little surprised that I didn't already go. Except I hate most people and crowds, so I'm not really surprised.

Has anyone seen it? Did you love it? The resounding feedback seems to be that it lives up to the books. OH MY GOD.

Let's look at a couple of things they wore to the premieres:

Elizabeth Banks' dress NEEDS to happen on me. I love it. I love the yellow, I love the bands, I love everything about it. Not loving Jennifer Lawrence's dress, but she did better on other outings so it's forgivable.

Elizabeth Banks needs to lay off the bronzer though, seriously.

Girl on fire much? If you haven't read the books or haven't yet seen the movie you won't understand that and I'm a nerd.

I like this dress. It's cute.

Those shoes make me want to die because of how tacky they are. Ew.

OH MY GOD, I'M SO EXCITED!!!!

Whitney Houston's Cause Of Death Released

Yesterday the LA coroner released their analysis and conclusion based on the results of the autopsy performed on Whitney Houston. 

In layman's terms, she died of a heart attack. The heart attack was caused by a very recent use of cocaine (moments before she drowned) and by a pre-existing heart condition which was caused by heavy cocaine use over a long time.

They also found prescription drugs and marijuana in her system, but nothing that would have caused her death.

There is a lot of chatter about the cocaine being cleared out of the room before the authorities arrived by the same person who had supplied it to her...many say her then-boyfriend, Ray-J.

Sad.

Sofia Vergara Looks Awful.....and This Product Kinda Sucks

This is an ad for Covergirl's Blast Flipstick, and I believe it's Sofia Vergara's first campaign with the company. I don't get how you make this lady look bad? She'd be gorgeous in anything. Why did they make her look like an 80's latin dancer? For shame Covergirl, for shame. Also, this product is not good. It's sooooo dry. I hate lipsticks that make me feel like a corpse. To quote a good friend, "it looks dated, the glittery end is cheap looking and you can only blend it if you never speak." I think that about sums it up. Oh, and it's only available in super loud colors. It's on my Bane List.

Madonna's New Song: Gang Bang

My new decision is that if Madonna is going to prance around without pants going forward, I would like her to stand only behind glass like the above. Blurrier if they can manage it, but I hope at least that blurry.

So, after Madonna's crap show of a first single, she's released a teaser to her next single, which I quite like. It sounds GOOD.

Seriously though, more blurry glass!

I'm Ashamed To Admit Miley Looks Good

Ok, cut off her face.

That outfit is hot.

Am I deranged?

I think I should be taken outside the barn and shot.

I actually really love this outfit.

Jessica Simpson Is Going to Give Birth To a Toddler, Right?

She has been pregnant FOREVER. AND she's as big as a house.

She might as well just lie on one of the nap mats at a pre-school and just drop the kid off.

That is not going to be a baby coming out of her.

Hey Zeus.

Jessica Biel's Engagement Ring

Freaking took them long enough.

Did anyone see Trousersnake on Maya Rudolph's SNL episode? He looked bad, and it wasn't just make-up. He had some serious under eye baggage going on.

Lilo is a Ginge Again!

I have a couple of things to say:

1. Hallelujah!
2. Why am I such a maroon that I didn't go the Mercer Hotel when I was in NYC earlier this week. I hate myself right now.
3. She's a ginge! 
4. No, seriously. SHE WENT REDHEAD. If she stays like this I feel like I can trust her to return to her previous glory.

Am I too naive?

Tell me I have something to believe in.

Please.

Product Review: Marcelle BB Cream

Ohhhh the BB Cream. This is the hottest trend in makeup. It's actually sold out on their website and it's really hard to find in stores. Mark my words, every cosmetic company will be shoving BB Creams down our throats by Fall. Marcelle has a huge jump on the competition.

I don't know what's up with them lately, maybe a new CEO or something, but these guys are coming out with new and trendy products every week.

The BB Cream (aka beauty balm) is an all-in-one kind of cream. It claims to be a moisturizer, makeup base, light foundation, concealer, reduces pores, and treats fine lines and blemishes. All this one is missing is an SPF. It's available in 2 shades (light, dark) but the dark is only dark enough for medium tone skin. I like this product. I don't love it. It has a great feel and light smell. I find there's not enough coverage and the lack of sunscreen is a problem for me, but for the price, it's definitely worth trying.

Lindsay Bloathan - Double Chin Watch 2012

What in the HELL??

What is going on with her face? 

Oh my god. Ok, obviously this is a terrible snapshot in time, because below she doesn't look nearly as bad. But seriously, her face is disastrous. She's 25!!! Why does she look like this? Remember how fresh and beautiful she was?

Here is the most annoying interview of all time because I feel like we've heard it 86 times before from this twit.

Enjoy 0:45, it's so freaky.

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