Remember Ben Affleck's Hair? It Got Worse.

A couple of weeks ago I lost my mind over Ben Affleck's hair. It was so Adrian Grenier from 'Entourage'. So bad.

Anyhoo, there seems to have been a reason. Ben was growing it out so he could get the Bieber. Oh. Duh.

OMG. How embarrasing!

Seriously, have not been able to stop giggling since finding these pictures.

Fantastic.

Hunger Games Photos!

If you're like me, and you probably are or you wouldn't be reading this site, you're really f-ing excited for the 'Hunger Games' movies.

I devoured the books. DEVOURED.

At first I wasn't super excited at the casting...while I like me some Jennifer Lawrence I didn't think her babyfat face could pull off a starving district 12 teen...but she looks a little thinner...still not starving, but she's charmed me in her recent movies, so I'm open.

I'm still not in love with the Gale/Peeta casting...but whatever. I'll deal.

So anyhoo, here are a couple of pics from the set. I'm SO EXCITED!!!

George Clooney and Brad Pitt Have New Wax Statues

Um, WTF?

Seriously, who are these people supposed to be?

Brad looks greasy and way older than he should and that 'George Clooney' looks more like a character from 'Coronation Street' than it does George Clooney.

Wouldn't you expect a speech bubble over that statue's head saying 'blimey'?

I rarely find wax statues look more than 65% like their human likenesses. I do not get the excitement of going to look at these. It's weird.

If it was of ME I'd understand. I mean, then it's about me. Duh.

Seriously Katy Perry, Not Everyone is Meant To Be Blonde

Does anyone know how to get in touch with her management?

Why would someone who looks like this when they're brunette, dye their hair to look like this?

I get that you're the voice of Smurfette. The beauty of animation is that you don't actually have to look like the character you're voicing (just ask the relieved voice actors from 'The Little Mermaid', 'The Raccoons', etc).

This is not good.

Also, why does Papa Smurf have such a defined crotchal region? It's upsetting me.

RIP Amy Winehouse

Amy Winehouse passed away this past weekend while I was up at my cottage away from internet and mobile signals. Sorry I'm late. I hope the people who surrounded her are sorry too, this was definitely a death that could have been avoided.

Amy, who had been monitored by security every few hours and doctors at least weekly was seen by a doctor on Friday night and showed no signs of being ill. Later that night she was out in Camden looking to score Special K (ketamine), heroin, coke and ecstasy...all being mixed with the hard booze she was already drinking. Friends who were with her said she seemed determined to have a great time partying.

She told her security team she was going down for a nap on Saturday morning and never woke up.

The blood and toxicology test results will not be revealed for another week or so. Amy was cremated and buried today in England. She was 27 years old.

Kristen Stewart Looks Miserable. Shocking.

Kristen Steward is starring in the new live-action Snow White movie. Oh look, her character looks like a sullen little bitch. How shocking.

Does this girl know how to play any other facet of human behavior? I'm very annoyed by this.

In other news, Charlize looks bad ass as the queen.

Jennifer Aniston Looks Unseemly.

Seriously. Couldn't think of another word. I HATE this outfit.

WTF is she thinking? Not only is the dress totally Michelle Williams with that floral thing down the front but those shoes are heinous.

We have discussed Jennifer's penchant for shitty shoes in recent months, but this is over the top. It looks like she wrapped tortillas on her feet and tied a ribbon around it. BurFEETos. Nice.

Best joke ever.

Retiring.

Things That Make Me Happy: Fabio is BACK

Ahh, the 90's. When people like Fabio were deemed attractive by desperate middle aged women.

You have got to give it to the Old Spice people, they have got it going on.

Nice.

Tom Cruise Is Embarrassing

Seriously. Imagine this guy was your dad!? I would DIE. Enunciated similar to this. DIE DIE DIE.

Like, how ashamed would you be when he shows up with his dorky long hair and weird straw hat to drop you off at school? Or, like, you forget your lunch and he brings is to you wearing his concealed high heel sneakers with white socks, old man shorts and his straw hat?

DIE DIE DIE.

Also, I find it suspect that he just happens to have a group of 5 men in his room to summon onto the balcony. Mmm hmmm.

Tom Cruise has never recovered, in my eyes, from that Oprah couch incident when he started dating Katie...this is making it worse. And making some other things a little clearer, no?

I'm less and less convinced of his heterosexuality.

Jennifer Lopez & Mark Anthony Announce Their Divorce

Wow. I wasn't expecting this.

Well, they were seriously the most mismatched couple ever, aside from both being of latin descent. I mean really, she is a woman with the worlds biggest ego and 2nd biggest butt (Kim K wins that one) and he is a tiny man.

Hmmm, I wonder what's behind it. I bet you it's his vampirism. COME ON. Don't tell me you think that man drinks water like the rest of us. Look at him.

Can we please discuss that he's clearly walking on a heightened path here? Come on. Who am I? A fool?

The answer is yes, for those of you wondering.

Depressing Headline Alert: Kate Middleton Brings Back Pantyhose

Um, does the idiot who wrote this article remember what wearing pantyhose is like?

Just a reminder for you ladies who don't: it's horror. You have these things pulled up to your boobs and no matter what the crotch ends up at your knees mid day. It's really not good.

And the ones she's wearing are heinous. They're all shiny and sparkly and I won't wear them. I WON'T I TELL YOU.

Mind you, I railed on and on about not tucking ones pants into jeans a few years back and guess who has 47 pairs of boots and many pairs of jeans she tucks into them.

I don't know, unless you work in a very conservative job (law firm, etc) there really isn't any reason to wear these. She's a royal. She HAS to wear them. She can't even wear open toed shoes for the love of god.

Oh the horror.

I guess this is why I'm not royal. I'm a lazy slob. Hee hee.

Mila Kunis Looks Good, But...

Mila Kunis is obviously beautiful. Duh.

I hate this photo shoot though. I don't know who styled it, but they should be shot.

For an intenseley beautiful girl, she has been styled into a room that looks like neutral vomit.

Beige carpet, blush blouse, white puple, white mirror, white bedspread...the only pop of color is her panties and her hair...it's really washed out and gross. I hate it.

Now I'm angry with GQ.

Blake Lively Has BRUTAL Tan Lines. Shame. Shame. Shame.

As you all know, I have a minor (see: major) girl crush on Blake Lively. I really do think she's lovely.

This is not one of her best showings.

First, the dress is atrocious. It's way overdone...too much detail, too encrusted...it's just over the top.

Then there's her face. What is going on there? Has she been drinking tar instead of water? Her face looks all shriveled and sweaty...

Then there is the halter string bikini tan line. Honestly, I hate nothing more than a tan line like that. Nothing can ruin a wedding faster for me than seeing a bridesmaid in a strapless dress with strap tan lines going up behind her neck. SO cheese.

So now that I connect that and her face, I have to assume that she was tanning up until 26 minutes before the red carpet for the event. It explains the sweatiness and the awful, tacky tan lines.

Yuck.

In other news, she and Leo are still together. Duh.

Ben Affleck's Hair is SO Great.

I have seriously laughed at this picture SO many times. It's so good. I mean, HIS HAIR. It's so puffy and full...

And I love that it looks like Serafina is laughing at him a bit too...

And that his facial expression is one of shame mixed with anger because he realized that he's been caught with his hair looking like that. OMG.

This picture is fantastic. I love it.

Pregnant Posh Looks Awesome

David Beckham posted this picture on Facebook of Victoria Beckham sunbathing yesterday.

He claimed it was candid. We know Posh. We know this is by no means candid. Posh does not do candid photos. Especially in a bathing suit.

No one is that thin and ok with having their picture taken pregnant candidly. Come on.

She looks amazing though. And he takes a nice photo.

Rumer Willis Should Go To Her Mom's Plastic Surgeon

If you were one of the Willis girls, how much would you be constantly asking your mother to pretty please allow you to get the same plastic surgery? I would be doing this Stewie thing all the time to try to get her to let me:

And only then would I look this happy. Especially if I was wearing those denim shorts and my butt looked like the above picture.

Also, I would faux tan.

Megan Fox Tries To Convince Us She Doesn't Have Botox

Megan Fox must really take me for some kind of asshole. Seriously. Yesterday, she posted a bunch of pics trying to prove to people that she doesn't have Botox. Mmm hmm.

I have friends who have Botox. I have seen their foreheads do weird things like this. To me, this doesn't disprove, this PROVES. Whose f-ing forehead does that when they squinch it up? The parts that aren't wrinkling are clearly Botoxed. They're frozen. Whereas normally if she had actual movement in her facial muscles, her whole forehead would be involved in that movement.

There were a couple more, but I don't want to give this bitch any credit for trying to fool us. FOOL US!

Love that she didn't address her insanely plumped lips. And did all of this with a face of FULL serious HD make-up.

Au naturel my ass.

Snooki Humping A Plant - Worth Your Time

So remember the other day when I posted about Snooki being wasted and getting kicked out of places. She did some other great things that day, including dancing with/humping a plant.

Check it out over at TMZ.

I can't embed it because TMZ are jerks, but I guarantee you it's worth your time. I mean, just look at the screen cap. Tee hee!

James Spader is Joining The Cast of 'The Office'

If you watched last season's final few episodes of 'The Office' you saw them 'auditioning' options for Steve Carrell's replacement. It was pretty funny. Lots of odd characters.

Well, they've announced who they're casting James Spader...but it's a bit more complex, here's what executive producer Paul Lieberstein (also the guy who plays Toby) said,

“James will reprise his role as Robert California, this uber-salesman that has a power to convince and manipulate, like a high-class weirdo Jedi warrior. He’ll have been hired over the summer as the new manager, but within hours, got himself promoted. Within days, he took over the company. James has an energy that is completely his own, and ‘The Office’ has no tools for dealing with this guy. We’re thrilled he’s joining our cast.”

He was SO weird in his interview. I'm so excited to see where this goes...BUT, if he takes over the company (because Kathy Bates has another show), then again, aren't we out an office manager?

Discuss!

Lindsay Lohan Pretends She Is Natural

You know, not to be all sciencey and stuff, because that's not really my racket. Holy hell, who am I today?

Anyhoo, about that sciencey stuff - you guys know that fruits fermented become alcohol, right? Yup, because y'all (hee hee) are smart.

Anyhoo, just because bitch is shopping at Whole Foods and wearing a fisherman's sweater, doesn't make me think she's wholesome and not up to something stupid. Especially wearing shorts with a 3/4" inseam. Ho.

Especially now that news reports are surfacing that Samantha Ronson has a new girlfriend...a pretty, rich, talented and connected one: David Foster's daughter - Erin.

I'm atwitter with anticipation for this one to blow up.

Oh, and also - MOCCASINS? Come on. Those are totally my mother's shoes.

Jersey Shore Drama - Snooki Wasted Again, Gets Kicked/Lifted Out of Bar

I am delighted by the story these photos tell all by themselves. But to give you some back story, it seems that Snooki got wasted in Jersey...again...but luckily didn't get her ass arrested like last year.

Yes.

Ok, let's allow this story to tell itself:

Deena is having fun, lying on top of...Pauly D? Who else has the word 'Cadillac' tattooed on their body? Other douchebags, I know, I know.

Snooki meanwhile is getting wasted at Jenks', the group's favourite local bar. She gets so shit faced that she is carried back to the beach to her friends by this guy, who is really getting his workout of the day.

Deena feigns ignorance! She doesn't know what's wrong with Snooki. I do. Too few yards of fabric and too many yard size beverages. Also, apparently, vision, because I do not care for that pattern mix.

Ahh, I'm so excited. When is this hot mess on TV?

Finally! Proof of Rihanna and Drake as a Couple

Everyone has been waiting on this proof for a while and it happened in my home town...almost a month ago, but still!

Apparently on June 12th, Rihanna and Drake were seen at BuonnaNotte supper club and they were "all over each other" and "inseparable".

Finally.

They look cute together. Mind you, I'm pretty sure that pose looks PRETTY neutral. Anyhoo.

At least no one said 'canoodling'.

Jersey Shore Season 5 Update: Vinnie Storms Out!

So, apparently, Vinnie stormed off the set of Jersey Shore season 5 after a fight with another cast member. No news who, but Pauly walked him out and helped him pack the car.

Apparently Vinnie has been a major pain in the ass this season and no one wants to call him back. That sucks. I love Vinnie.

Happy Birthday or Something To Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan turned 25 this weekend. Wow, she certainly acts it, doesn't she?

I was joking, don't worry.

Here she is, out for dinner, etc despite having claimed she was frightened of the paps on the last day of her house arrest.

It looks like she fried her hair even lighter. Bitch, go back to red, we ALL like it better. Come on.

She looks amazing in that dress though. It's really annoying.

I like when she carries a little more weight than her meth-head look. she looks so much better. Meth head chic is so last year. Hee hee.

Rachel Zoe Is Still Shockingly Thin

I watched the 'Rachel Zoe Project'. I loved it. Not because she isn't annoying, but because she does have a fantastic sense of style and the stuff she gets to use is AMAZING. Like, it makes me want to slit my wrists a bit.

BUT, I always had a lot of trouble understanding how it could be possible that her body could sustain a pregnancy and the fact that we barely saw her through it makes me think it's even more suspect...

And now look at her. Back to ridiculously emaciated size and holding a baby who is nearly her weight already.

Something fishy here, no? Surrogate?

Zooey Deschanel Looks Interesting

I'm not sure if it's the dress, or the hair, or the posture or what, but if I were here, I would avoid standing next to that thinnified, Photoshopped photo of her. Yikes.

She looks like such a disaster here.

Strapless dresses can look so great, but if you don't pull your shoulders back and make sure it stays up, you can look like, well, Zoeey Deschanel does here.

And whoever did her hair here should be shot. Seriously. not cool.

And black tights? It's summer. Enough with that now.

Sooo, I Thought This Was Pink...

It's not Pink. It's Brigitte Nielsen. Which makes sense because I was like, 'how did Pink get so tall and lose all that baby weight so fast?'

Duh.

Also, I feel bad that I said that now. Ha ha. Ok, not really.

Jennifer Aniston Has Shoe Issues

Jennifer Aniston seems to be the last person on earth to not catch on to this chunky heel/wedge/platform phenomenon.

I love this woman, I may even idolize this woman, but she has some serious shoe problems. Like, what person out there doesn't know that a platform pump or a strong 70's heel is way better than those strappy bridesmaid messes she has on her feet?

I love me some Jennifer Aniston, but that dress and her legs deserve way better than those cheesy little black shoes...which are just a permutation of a million other black, strappy shoes she wears.

It's one of her biggest faults. It depresses me. Having bad shoe mojo is seriously embarrassing.

Kate and Wills are in Canada for Canada Day

ONCE. Once a year I get a little nerdy about being Canadian. Ok, then also every 4 years at the Olympics.

Either way.

The Duke and Duchess William and Katherine are making a visit to my lovely country this week, including a visit to our capitol on our national holiday, Canada Day. This is awesome. They're also visiting my home province and home city, Montreal, Quebec.

Apparently some tools in Quebec City, Quebec are planning to protest the monarchy and have hired security, but they better not embarrass this country and province. They will. They just will. Ugh.

Anyway, welcome to Wills and Kate as they visit Canada over the next few days, and thank you to Kate for wearing this surprisingly glam Canadian maple leaf hat on Canaday Day.

Happy Canada Day Canadians!

Kate Moss got Married

Kate Moss got married today in England to Jamie Hince of something. Shut up. You look it up.

GOD! Fine, I guess that's why you read this blog or something.

OK, he'd from the band 'The Kills', and he's the guitarist.

I would love to be a guest at that wedding. Imagine what an epic party that would be? Insanity.

In other news, and pretty significant news, she's wearing John Galliano which is a pretty bold move. But it's Kate Moss. Not so bold really.

No one else would be seen dead in Galliano right now...after the racist rants...so she's got balls. But Kate Moss has always had balls and she's brought many a designer back from the gutters. Hmmm.

Curious.

In other news, I'm sure Londoners are pissed this weekend that they can't score blow because its all been reserved for Kate's wedding weekend.