People I Love: Jon Hamm & Galifinakis

This scene is good times.

Thanks to Stewart Turkey Leg for posting this on Facebook and reminding me how hilarious it is.

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis: Jon Hamm from Between Two Ferns

Two Beardy Guys - Gerard Butler & Hugh Jackman

Since when is Gerard Butler anorexic? Since Jennifer Aniston stopped fake dating him?

He is SO thin. I've never seen him so thin.

And then there's Hugh. I don't want to jump to conclusions, but that's kind of what I do on this blog, so I'm going to. Did he get his eyes done?

I'd very much like to see other pictures of this evening to see if he looks so smooth in the forehead and tight in the eyes...Hmmm

I'm sure we could use this photo to write a new nursery rhyme:

Two Bearded Men

Two Beared Men

And YOU take it. Finish it in the comments.

People Really Don't Like Claire Danes

I'm not making this up. This girl is not well loved in Hollywood, or especially on blogs. People really don't like her.

I was trying to figure out why, because I normally like her, but now I'm starting to be swayed by some of the arguments people make for why they don't like her. Here are some reasons:

• She is apparently a frigid bitch, acts like reporters are garbage and no one deserves her time
• She stole Billy Crudup from his pregnant wife and then didn't even stay with him
• She has super vacant eyes and never really looks like she's at any of the events she's attending
• She's disgustingly thing (this plus vacant eyes = drug problem?)
• She has developed a faux English accent now that she's married to an English man.

Honestly, that last point is enough for me. I f-ing hate when people do that. I know someone who has lived in England for 2 years and she doesn't have an accent. It's a choice people make to try to blend in. Ugh.

Also, I think her eye make-up above is enough to dislike her. Yuck!

The Carousel of Hope Gala

Yay! People got dressed up.

Unfortunately, though, these outfits are kind of frightening. What the hell am I saying 'unfortunately'? I mean fantastically (for us).

Brandi:

So this looks like she dragged her train through a muddy puddle or something. OR it's one of her costumes from Dancing with the Stars. It's just very prom, and not awesome. What's with that weird draping at the bottom front.

Daisy Fuentes:

So, um, Daisy seems to have decided to wear a shortie bathrobe with some heels from 1994. Wow. Actually, when you think of it, she's kind of from 1994, so it's almost ok. Almost. Not.

Garcelle Beauvais:

She looks quite lovely, actually. I love this dress. It seems to be a bit big on her though...or, is she pregnant? I don't know. I like it, a lot, but it seems like it doesn't fit her at all.

Halle Berry:

This woman makes me embarrassed to share her sex. She is so goddam beautiful. And her hair looks bloody fantastic. The only thing I will say that is negative is that she really really needs a sandwich. She's too thin. It's kind of icky.

Jennifer Lopez:

A lot of people hate this dress. I don't. I don't love the tulle at the bottom. Actually, I kind of hate it, but I love the beading. It's really gorgeous. Without that nasty tulle bottom this could have been a really wonderful wedding dress.

I don't know. I don't dislike it. Aside from the tulle.

Keri Lynn Pratt:

I totally only took this picture because this dress is so ridiculous. Because really, who the hell is this?

It looks like she's wearing aluminum pie plates on her sides. Or 2 sharks with grills bit her on each side. Really, fantastically fugly.

Leah Remini:

Did you ever watch 'King of Queens'? This woman was such a wicked bitch on that show. I find her quite beautiful, but I hate her because her character was such a raging witch. I also don't love her because she's a Scientologist, and everyone knows Scientologists are scary.

In other news, her dress is REALLY big. Though not ugly.

Lisa Rinna:

I think it's a really scary thing when Lisa Rinna is one of the classiest, most understated guests at an event. Obviously the apocalypse is coming. I'm really glad that we bought a lot of canned goods last week.

Her smaller lip looks better though, non?

Mira Sorvino:

Is she still relevant? Because her outfit isn't! Badum-ching! Ha ha!

No, really, where did she get that? Winners/TJMaxx? And the shoes. Oh heavens, the shoes!

Nancy O'Dell:

As you might know, I am obsessed with how Nancy O'Dell stands. This woman manages to stand almost sideways and looks so much thinner than she is. She should teach courses.

One thing I wonder about this look is if that is her real hair, because it is insanely thick and lustrous. I want that hair. But I don't want extensions because then I'd have to maintain them and I'm very lazy.

I don't like the dress, but I have barely liked one in this bunch, are we really surprised?

Nicky Hilton:

Wow. This is unflattering. Normally Nicky wears cute things, but she is definitely not tonight. That dress is ultra fugly. So heavy and it's almost, like, drapery fabric. I feel like her face almost says that she knows it's stupid and making her head look tiny.

Parasite Hilton:

This moron is apparently trying to shed her party girl image and going to be a grown up now that she got busted with coke in Vegas. I guess the first step of this is to wear a chenille blanket as the skirt of her evening gown.

Of course this twat would wear pink. But really, there had to be better options in pink. This is disgusting and again, very prom-y.

Raquel Welch:

GOD DAMN! I hope I look this hot one day. She is HOT. The dress is lovely and while it is too tight, she is rocking it. Let's consider her age here, because she gets automatic points for looking better than most 20 year olds today. Muffin Tops are an EPIDEMIC!

Sela Ward:

Underdressed much? I know we always say that you can't go wrong with a little black dress but considering the obnoxious hot messes that everyone else is wearing, doesn't she seem a little more like she's going to an office happy hour than to a gala?

Susan Lucci & Her Implants:

Um, these are conspicuous. And wonky. I love that she's wearing lame. Again, she gets automatic points for her age, but immediate deductions for the dress and the wonky boobs. And the 90's hair. Yikes.

Anna Kendrick Needs Help. Now. Rachel Zoe! Get on This!

Anna Kendrick is super cute. SUPER cute. But oh my god, she needs a new stylist.

This dress is weird. It has too many levels, it fits poorly and it's like a 1994 prom came alive to kill her.

And then there are the shoes. Are those butterflies in studs on her feet? So bad. SO BAD.

And then she wore this. Again, it's like a bridesmaid dress (this time) came back from the dead to attack fashion. Her cleavage is too much in that color...it looks garish and tacky in that color. It makes me want to barf a bit.

And the shoes, oh my god. They really do not match with that outfit at all.

It's not good. She needs help.

Kim Kardashian Dresses Interestingly

So, shoulder curtains.

Are we doing this?

I'm sure it must be hard to be KK, she's photographed several times a week and I can't even imagine if I was photographed that many times WTF I would wear.

BUT, to be fair, if I was that rich, I'm pretty sure I wold wear nicer things than this. Like really? That shoulder is ridonc.

And not the good ridonc.

JWoww Releases a Tanning Line

JWoww released some tanning products this week. I think she and Pauly and the Situation have done really well with the fame they have acquired. They're leveraging.

One thing I do not like though, is this poster...what's with the hand position? Does fake tanning make you zen?

Weird.

Lindsay Lohan Avoids Jail...Again. SHOCKING.

And by shocking, I mean really not. I hope that if I ever get arrested in life, it's in LA and that I'm a celebrity at the time, because they don't seem to pay for what they do at all.

I'm not saying that bitch shouldn't be in rehab, because that's where she belongs, but she should also do some jail time. I mean, come on.

Anyhoo, she'll be in rehab until January 3, at least. The judge has decreed that.

Rumor has it though, that she has been having trouble paying for rehab and has been begging her friends for money to help her pay...for something. No one knows what, but everyone assumes it is for rehab. Betty Ford isn't cheap.

She looks a little smug in this photo, post court, non?

Hilary Duff's Veneer Fell Out on her Wedding Day

This is one of the best things I've ever read.

If you've been reading this blog for a while, you know I have always mocked Hilary Duff's veneers. I think they're super huge and totally ridiculous. Exactly how I used to look when I used my mom's Chiclets as fake teeth.

Here's the quote:

“I bit into a bagel. I was sitting on the bed with my mom and my sister, and they’re like, ‘You’re an idiot. You did not. Come on.’ I burst into tears. Then I started laughing at myself, and then I really burst into tears. Thank God I didn’t swallow [my tooth]. Not good for a bride on her wedding day.”

KARMA.

Also, seriously? What kind of f-ing bagel was that?

The Situations Has A BOOK

Um.

I am worried this blog has become posts about things I just don't get. Because I really just don't get what is going on in society anymore.

Can someone please tell me who even wants to know about "creeping on chicks, avoiding grenades and getting in your GTL on the Jersey Shore"?

And for real, how douchey do you have to be to have a book cover with one of your nipples exposed?!

Ugh.

I'm moving to an island.

I'm Not Gay, But I Might Be For Blake Lively

For real, do you think she would be my girlfriend?

Or is she not into married 30 year old women?

I love her.

I also really love that jacket.

We Get it 'Glee', You're Provacative

Sometimes you can be provocative without flashing your panties everywhere. I mean, seriously. I would like to file these under 'too much'. I don't think anyone is going to be proud of these in 10 years. They're icky and embarrassing. Though, I wouldn't complain if my body looked like that.

But really? This? Is this necessary? It's a show geared toward young people, isn't it?

Beyonce is Rumoured To be Preggo

That's how you spell rumour in Canada, ok!?!

Anyhoo, They're saying Bey is preggers again. Here is the quote from In Touch magazine (soooo reliable):

"B was shocked. She loves kids, but she wasn't ready to be a mother just yet. She really wanted to get her album done and tour the world again. "

Um, really? How shocked can one possibly be? You're using birth control or you're not. "OMG! We stopped using condoms and I got pregnant. How could that possibly happen!?"

Anyhoo, if it's true, which it rarely is, I bet that baby is going to be CUUUTTTE!

Kate Hudson Looks Really Fresh...

I am super lying in the post title. She does not look good.

It's a pretty well known fact that she's dating Matt Bellamy from 'the Muse' and given her glassy eyes, pasty, sweaty skin and serious sleep hair I'm a little worried she's fallen into that musician glamour life where drugs always seem to pop up.

I mean, who the hell goes out looking like that? Her hair is really, really bad. It's to the point of being offensive.

I wonder what Rachel Zoe has to say about this...

If Jean Claude Van Damme Has a Heart Attack...

No, for real. If this guy has a heart attack (which he did earlier this week) then what does that say for the rest of us slobs?

To be fair, I don't know what his situation is since this photo was taken, but it's not like he's obese and in terrible shape. He's JCVD!

Ominous...

Ugh, I Wish Painting Was This Easy

Willow Smith's debut video.

I applaud Will Smith and Jada Pinkett for letting that little girl be wholesome and girly and not a little ho bag like those Cyrus tramps.

And....I'm 90.

Lady Gaga Looking MUCH Healthier Than She Has In a While

Sometimes, people overdo it. They live by extremes and they're either super fit and skinny or gross. Ahem, Janet Jackson.

I'm happy to see that Gaga is not, but that she doesn't look as insanely emaciated as she did near the end of the Monster Ball tour. She was freaking me out she was so thin.

I'm annoyed because people are saying she looks pudgy, but let's be honest, she just doesn't look like she spends 4 hours a day dancing and practicing. She looks a hell of a lot better than most of us slobs out here...especially those of us in the blogosphere.

Yay for Gaga!

But for reals, all that hair color change is shredding her hair. It looks like straw. Work the wigs woman!

Rihanna Dressed as my Aunt Jan

I love my Aunt Jan, but that woman wore leggings with matching large sweatshirts/sweaters longer than it should have been legal to do so. She also preferred versions with overly huge shoulder pads.

I'm happy to see that this outfit doesn't have shoulder pads, but that doesn't make it less hideous. I know that RiRi is famous for breaking all fashion rules, but looking disgusting is not acceptable.

Pale pink leggings are really not ok. I am banning them from my mind and now I see only legs on the photo. That is how super powered I am in the mind!

I think I need more sleep.

For real though, I think my aunt wore this outfit to Christmas one year...except the top was mohair. She loved mohair.

So, Um Ashlee Simpson looks uh...goood

No. No she doesn't. She looks sick. And I don't know if this is her when her extensions are out for some breathing time, but it is terrible to look at. TERRIBLE.

It's not only the hair though, but she's just so alarmingly thin. Look at her head perched a top her neck and the jutting chin. Ok, fine, the chin/nose thing is a plastic surgeon's fault, but still, she's way too skinny.

It's really gross and slightly alarming.

Adam Sandler as a Woman...

He's about as attractive as you thought he'd be, right? Ha ha, one of those grossed out shivers just ran down my spine.

Ick.

Where is This Girl's Mother?

I'm not saying my parents were excellent at keeping me in line or anything, but they would have NEVER allowed me to pose for a magazine wearing this hot mess outfit and then spout out things about watching porn and loving vibrators when I was 17!!!

HOLY CRAP.

Someone needs to jail this girl's parents because this cannot end well.

Seriously. I am frightened for society and may become a Mormon and live a simpler life, because clearly I don't understand the route the world is taking today.

Is it just me or is this totally f-d up?

Avril Lavigne Should Keep Her Top On

Is it just me, or is Avril Lavigne completely irrelevant? Like, totally. Who cares that she exists anymore? Do people really think about her?

Anyhoo, here she is in a photo shoot to bring her back into the public eye or something...and she's not wearing a top. It bothers me.

Ew.

I Want to Punch Miley Cyrus

I don't know what it is about this girl that gets me so violent, but it's something. Maybe it's because she's wearing the exact outfits that I wore in high school years ago and looking smug about it. Maybe it's her hideous rodent teeth, or her disgusting hair. Maybe it's the fact that she dresses like a truck stop hooker almost all the time...

I honestly don't know. All I know is that I want to sit on her chest and tee off on her face.

Gavin Rossdale Did Stuff Before He Married Gwen Stefani

I don't know what everyone has their knickers in a twist over in this situation...

Years ago, Marilyn, a famous cross dressing singer from the UK, claimed that she had a relationship with Gavin Rossdale. Boy George backed up the claim by affirming it in his autobiography, but Gavin Rossdale always denied or avoided questions about it, despite these photos that were always around.

In this month's Details magazine, Gavin finally acknowledges their relationship and speaks to his experimentation.

"I think at the outset there was a sort of fear—that was right at the beginning of Bush, and I didn't want it to be part of it. It felt like a cheap shot, so I was like, 'I'm not getting involved.' I've never wanted to appear closed about it. It's not something I've talked about really because it's always been in the glare of a tabloid world. It's just one of those things: Move on. When you're 17, Jesus Christ. I don't think there's anything strange about any form of—you're learning about life. It's a part of growing up. That's it. No more, no less."

I don't know what everyone is freaking out about. Leave the guy alone. Everyone is allowed to do what they want and if you're judging people for being homosexual or experimenting with homosexuality you should dig yourself a deep hole and go live in it, because you're not welcome in my society.

I love his top in that picture! Fantastic.

Celebrity break-ups of the day

A couple of Hollywood couples (ha!) announced their separation and their commitment to their children today...

Courtney Cox and David Arquette:

They actually announced this on Monday. Worst part is David Arquette stupidly went on Howard Stern this morning and started giving all sorts of details about their relationship...the last time they had sex, how many times he cheated, the fact that she had an emotional relationship with someone else...

He sounds like he knows what she's upset about but then he's talking about it on Howard Stern. Let's be honest, no one ever knew what the hell these two were doing together. He's weird, not as hot as her and creepy. She's really pretty (though she really needs to stop putting collagen and Botox in her face) and super successful.

Hmmm. Their daughter, Coco, is 6.

Christina Aguilera & Jordan Bratman:

Another couple that no one ever understood. They got married 5 years ago, had their son, Max, 2 years ago and have announced their separation. I think it's because she has started to look like this:

No, seriously, she looks like Marilyn Monroe when MM was seriously hooked on the prescription drugs. Scary.

The Rachel Zoe Project - Compelling TV (?)

On a whim, I downloaded the first 2 seasons of 'The Rachel Zoe Project' and I'm now fully into it. I'm not obsessed, but Saturday I watched something like 5 or 6 episodes in a row, so I'm pretty much strongly liking it.

It's not the Rachel Zoe part, because she makes me want to barf and she's a total whiny bitch, but what she does, the clothes, the shoes - I'm obsessed with that. Honestly, anyone who could get the clothes she gets could be as good a stylist as her. Those looks make themselves, but it's just so fantastic.

And she's backstage at fashion shows kissing John Galliano and Mark Jacobs and Christian LaCroix and Karl Lagerfeld. I can't even stand it.

Also, as a Canadian, I love that Brad is on there and so cute.

Maybe watch it, I'm just saying!

For the record though, they have gone through countless scenese where other people eat and I have never seen her put a morsel of anything in her mouth. The only thing that goes in her system is Starbucks extra large tea or coffee.

JCrew is pushing the limits

Like, really. REALLY?!

I get the rugged handsomeness thing, but come on.

This is saying to me that the recession is so bad that Jesus had to go out and get a job.

Nicole Richie NORMALLY has good taste

WTF is this hot mess?

No, for real, what is this?

What year could she have possibly thought it was when she woke up and put this on?

And the make-up and the hair.

It's really so awful.

Really? They're still promoting this movie?

For real, this movie was showing on the plane last week. I was watching it's crapitude over someone's shoulder. MY stupid seat had no TV, it was ridiculous. It made me want to die spontaneously.

But in all honesty, don't they kind of look like a really dapper lesbian couple here?

Is Grey Hair hot right now?

And is it because of Betty White's (almost annoying) surge in popularity?

The weird thing is that I don't hate it.

What I do dislike though, is her touching Yoko Ono. What if she sucks her awesomeness out?

Is it possible?

Now even Katherine Heigl's hair hates her

Everyone hates this woman. I don't have anything in particular against her (ok, her laugh, and she really annoyed me in 'Knocked Up')...but I am definitely jumping on the bandwagon, because it makes my life easier. Going against the stream is for salmon. Not me.

I like salmon though.

Oh gad, what was I talking about?

Oh yah, so her hair. WTF?!?! She went blonde, from brunette - already this is a bad move. But the color is horrendous!

Who would dye their hair that color?

Why have 2 weeks gone by and no one has thrown some toner into that mess?