Thursday, January 31, 2008
I have issue with this one, see if you can tell why before I divulge my reason:
Now, correct me if I'm wrong, because it's been a while since I've enjoyed a viewing or reading of Peter Pan, but isn't that dude supposed to be the boy who doesn't AGE? Mikhail Baryshnikov is, like, 95! AND LOOKS IT! Is this the 'Hook' version? Holy cannoli! My goodness does he ever rock those dancer's legs though...
Seriously though, he's OLD.
Here are the rest, if you wanna - I find them bland in comparison to the last ones. Let's not even discuss Marc Anthony and J-Lo as Alladin & Jasmine. It fills me with a fiery fury.
[Source: Hollywood Snark]
Um. I'm confused.
I have been looking at this pic for a bit now and I'm still unsure as to whether that black part on the picture is part of the dress or if the dress bares her genitals and it's one of those black bars.
Hee hee, obviously kidding, but how did no one notice that during the design process?
Imagine it was one of the black bars though? And she was walking around with her vajayjay hanging out? Also, what kind of weird, drapey hoo-hah would she have to have to need the hanging part in the back?
Ok, now I'm laughing too hard to type because I'm picturing that.
[Pic source: Go Fug Yourself]
Apparently Minnie Driver is pregnant. Is there something in the water in Hollywood? Hésus! That's right, that's how I spell it.
Anyhoo. She mayb be giving birth to another giant-headed, huge-mouthed being like herself. Run for the hills everyone, they'll team up and eat us all!
Like her shirt dress and beach locale though...
To be honest, I am shocked at the size of her nipples in proportion to her tiny frame. NOW do you see what I mean about the world being boring? THIS is what I'm thinking about. God.
Seriously though, she may want to consider a lightly padded brassiere...or, you know, a shirt that isn't made of cheesecloth. Yikes.
Those sleeves are hid(eous) too.
MK from DListed posted this awesome video of people who got up on the London tube and performed 'Thriller' by Michael Jackson.
Why is it I always end up next to some sweaty guy with excessively long nose hair and rampant halitosis and these people get a show? London seems awesome.
PS - How hot are those girl's boots in the back? Damn!
Wow! Whoever is running this operation should have run the 'Star Wars' and 'Indiana Jones' production! Already, she's back in the hospital! A sequel in the same month!
Britney was taken to the hospital this morning ~3:30am EST. It was revealed early yesterday that she has been visited at home daily by a psychiatrist and this same psychiatrist called the cops late last night to get Brit taken to the hospital. She's gone to UCLA medical center (the same place Mariah Carey went back in the 90's).
She apparently went without a fuss, but the cops had to make it all fancy by taking her in an ambulance surrounded by a white van and ~15 motorcycle cops. They also apparently gave her the code name 'the PACKAGE'. Nice.
Lynne Spears, Alli Sims & Adnan are apparently at the hospital, but Sam Lufti is not welcome because he's been fighting with the Spears family over his handling of her life. Yah. It's HIS fault. Why don't y'all (hee hee) project your guilt a little more...
Anyhoo, more later, but isn't this fun? Again!
The pic is of Brit trying to get a sandwich earlier today...no wonder she's goddam crazy.
Monday, January 28, 2008
I continue to hate this girl for no good reason. She didn't do anything to me, she just irritates me. It irritates me especially that she can afford a Marchesa gown and I can't. Bitch. It is lovely though, I'll give her that...the teal is beautiful, her hair is very pretty, she's not too tan for once and that beading is to die for. Well done girl I randomly hate, well done.
Angelina Jolie & Bradd Pitt:
I decided that they deserve 2 photos and I'll explain why. Mostly because I find Angie's dress quite magical, despite the facts that it's all wrinkled in the front and that it's an obvious ploy to continue the rumors that she's preggo with twins by masking a lot of her. Which brings me to the most obvious part: her tata's. Woweee. Look at those things. They are not shy. In all seriousness, they're very attractive people and it's lovely that they're in love. Brad looks a little too hairy for my taste, but whatevs, he's rocking a 3-piece suit again and I have lots of respect for that. Well done kids.
I don't know what this douche's claim to fame is (oh, I have just been informed that it's High School Musical - I hate her more now), but I hate her stupid face and hair. She looks like Asslee Simpson too much and in my opinion one of her is MORE than enough. Nice dress though (I choose not to show it so that she doesn't look good - bwa ha ha!)
I find this woman very beautiful. I'm a little tired of the red lipstick look, but I'll let it pass, because it's an awards show. The dress is very beautiful, if not a little overdone. I'm a softie for white dresses at this point in life though, because I'm getting married soon. Hair is gross though...but look down and hers doesn't look so bad...
Speaking of messes! Wow! What happened to her? Did she go to the Mop Top Hair Shop? Damn! Aside from that, I love the neckline. It's a little dramatic, a little trying too hard, but it's great. It looks great on her figure (which seems to have FINALLY recovered since having the baby). Very nice. Hair color is lovely too.
Now here are the two together. I wouldn't cry if I looked like either of them. Would you?
Although I kind of hate this dress, when I compare it to what she wore the last time we saw her, it's a ten! It, unfortunately, looks like molten silver, but again, in comparison is quite lovely. Although, I'm really not liking that weird dude in the background. And could she do our retinas a favor and hit the spray tan just once?
Ok, I'm going to lay off Amanda Bynes for a while because Eva Longoria clearly deserves my hatred a lot more. What the hell is with this getup? Does she shop in the discount section of a soap opera sample sale? And who does her hair? I know, I know, I'm pretty sure her hairdresser is Ken Paves. Goddam. So ugly. And those earrings! She looks like she ripped them off from Alexis on an episode of 'Dallas'!
Seriously? That's your name? And that is the dress you chose? Where did you get the fabric? The Ikea upholstery discount bin? Holy hell. And next time, fix your GD roots. You are not welcome back on this blog until you fix yourself up missy!
Javier Bardem & Viggo Mortensen:
I like Viggo one way, with a beard, à la 'Lord of the Rings'. That was when he was hot. Javier is hot just like that. I love this picture because they seem to be having such a good time together and also, it shows how large Javier's features are! He's like a monster-face! Viggo's suit is hot, but he's #2 best dressed male after Brad...only for the color combo.
Is it just me or does she always look like she's at her high school prom and she feels really awkward because her best friend is totally dating the guy that she had a crush on all through April! God! She's just so young looking and non-Hollywood, which I love, but I would also love for her to scowl once. Just once.
Is that dress from JC Penney's? Seriously.
Joey Fatone & Lisa Rinna:
Oh my god Lisa, GO HOME. It's the eve of Joey's birthday and you're making him ham it up with you. Nice.
A rare misstep for our goddess...the dress is wretched, the butter yellow is horrible and her hair is weird. It's really disappointing for me to see her like this. It's not her best effort and I'm a little pissed that she would do this to me. THIN ICE KATE! (Wow, I am crazy)
I didn't realize Aerosmith made gowns...or that my hair-do from my grade 8 school picture had somehow jumped through time and pasted itself onto Kate's head...that is the WORST hair I have ever seen on her. It looks like a helmet! And that dress is a bit too hippie-dippie. Let's have a little respect for the institution that is fashion. Jeez.
She looks like a Smurf linebacker. No good. Like Jenna, she seems to have purchased her gown from the JC Penney prom collection. That lace train makes me want to kill someone. It's so hideous. She's a very lovely looking woman, but oh my god the horror of that dress makes it impossible to look at anything else.
Wow. The color is beautiful. it's unexpected, fresh and fantastic. She really knows how to dress up without trying too hard or looking like a skeezy whore. Fantastic. Seriously. I love it. I think it might be my favorite of the whole night.
Don't know who she is, but she's really beautiful. The dress color, like Martha's, is fresh and beautiful and compliments her skin very well. She looks like a fairy.
Hee hee, just noticed that her head looks off center on her torso because of the way she's posing.
Ageless. So beautiful. Her hair is a bit too dark for me, I think some highlights would help brighten her up a bit, but that's picky. She's gorge. She looks fabulous for any age. Is it wrong that I HATE her toenails being red like that?
Um. Uh...The only words that come to me are 'box of valentine's chocolates'. Oh wait, and 'ugly ones'.
THIS is yellow done right. This is what Kate Beckinsale should have looked like. This is a stunning gold-yellow gown in clean lines on a beautiful woman with a stunning figure. Wow. Ok, I'm tied between this and Marcia. I like Marcia for the elegance, I love this for the the daring choice that it is. Wow.
I really hope the writer's strike is settled soon, mostly because it's only fair that the people who provide the material are compensated, but also because this blog misses award shows. Good luck everyone. Hopefully we'll do another one soon!
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
I tried not to post about them but it's just so goddam interesting and the Heath Ledger post makes me sad.
While Adnan was driving a pap on a moto hit her car. Nutso.
Must be so scary. My car got hit by snow removal plow today while parked next to my office building and that's scary enough. I can't imagine being IN the car.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Heath Ledger, one of the film industries' most talented young actors was found dead today in his apartment.
He was found by his housekeeper who was coming to remind him of his massage appointment. It is said that he was found in his bedroom and prescription pills were found nearby.
He is survived by his 2-year old daughter Matilda and her mother, Michelle Williams.
The first 1:45 of this video is super boring and useless, but it gets magical quickly after. She's in full English accent, denies she even knows Adnan, tells a HOMELESS man he's better off being homeless than being her and claims that people steal her cell phones.
I know I promised to post only once a week, but this had to go up.
UPDATE: I should explain that I don't really think she's crazy. Well, a bit, but like a fox. I think she's playing the media, especially with this British accent & Adnan bullshit. As if she doesn't remember who he is. As if she actually thinks she's English.
Saturday, January 19, 2008
She's so boring now.
She does drive me super batty with the constant leggings though. Come on! TAKE THEM OFF. Here are a couple of pictures to brighten our lives and remind of us what once was, even if it does suck now:
Here is our favorite skank at the movie premiere of 'Cloverfield'. Does anyone know what that's about, btw, because the previews make me curious, but not curious enough to go see it.
Now let's be honest, she looks like a right out hooker here. The blonde hair is awful, I don't know why she insists on keeping it, and that style with all the volume at the bottom is not doing anything for her. Yikes.
Slutty dress, mondo cleavage and polyester giant hair equals either a Bratz doll or a hooker to me. What say you?
Here she is doing some shopping, changed out of her constant black outfits and into a "virginal" off-white get-up. Uh huh. Those lace leggings are probably really itchy and are definitely really gross. Plus, how fucking warm is it in LA that people are not wearing pants. Warm weather bastards.
Here she is trying to sneak out to traffic school all incognito. Um. If you wanted to be incognito you would have changed out of your fucking leggings into jeans, like a normal person. The idiot seen here in a black wig and leggings just looks like you in a black wig. You would have fooled us with a pants change-up.
[ Pic source: Celebrity Smack]
Um, I don't care what everyone says about Kate Moss being some fashion guru...she dresses like a tool sometimes and that is that! She actually looks more like a fortune teller to me here, and we all know how full of it they are!
Seriously though, as I mentioned in the subject, it looks like she ripped this off from my mom's closet. Really not cool. Also, the hair looks not unlike my mother's hair. Good god.
- TMZ claims to have sources that say Britney's problem is multiple personality disorder. There were several videos from last weekend that showed her running around speaking in a British (Brit-ish - right?) accent and it was mentioned that this British Britney is one of many personalities and anything she does while she is this person she doesn't remember, including running away from the custody hearing earlier this week.
- She was seen around town with a ring on her left ring finger - are she and Adnan engaged?
- Although I may not have mentioned this before, there were rumors that Brit was offered a film role of the girlfriend of a misdiagnosed mental patient. It came out this week that in light of her recent activities, the director chose to go with someone else.
- Alli Sims, Brit's cousin and former personal assistant, had an interview with US magazine claiming she thins Adnan is a skeeve and is only rockin' the Britnan relationship to get money.
- Ryan Seacrest's radio show called one of her handlers this week and tried to speak to her only to hear her scream at the guy that she was naked and needed a shower because she was nasty and stunk. Well noted, Brit. Well fucking noted.
- Associated Press (AP) is currently working on an obituary, just in case. This is not really news, they do this with most celebrities from what I understand, but it was all over the blogs this week.
- During a high-speed chase where Britney escaped without killing anyone, thank god, three paparazzi were arrested for reckless driving. Later this week a few more were ticketing while waiting for her outside a hotel for impeding the flow of traffic. It's about f-ing time!
- The disgusting pictures of her having her period and obviously not doing anything about it (guess she's not preggo) are here and here. I refuse to post them because they're so gross, but if you insist, you can see them at those links.
Oh! PS - I downloaded 'Blackout' and it's pretty f'ing good! There's one super suckass song (Toy Soldier) but the producing is surprisingly good.
[Pic source: Just Jared & DListed]
Friday, January 18, 2008
These are pics of them on a recent beach vacation somewhere. Here is a pic of her just a few years ago.
Pierce doesn't seem like the type of man to accept his wife like that. He strikes me as a pervy cheater. Case in point: the only time he's seen with her in the entire series of photos she's almost fully submerged.
[Pic source: Just Jared]
PISS ME OFF!
I think I may have to take him off my list. Not only because he's been looking quite haggard lately, but because he announced this week that he's having a baby with his "girlfriend" (aka BITCH!) Camilla Alves. Whore.
Seriously though, I'm happy for him.
Pissed. But happy.
What's with the baby-demic by the way?
Thursday, January 17, 2008
And HERE is yet another reason why this woman cannot be a 'model' as she claims to be. Gross. Please get your implant scars fixed or don't wear an almost-fully-unzipped hoodie as a top.
You can take the whore out of porn, but you can't wash the porn off of her.
Ick. Ick. Icky.
Oh - and also, look at her YM magazine special multi-color French manicure. Yikes.
I think Rachel Bilson may top my list of hollywood saviors/godsends. She's just great. Although I'm not crazy about her weird GQ spread, I still love her.
I mean, look at this dress she wore last weekend! EVERYONE is talking about it as being the most elegant, beautiful dress they've seen in years. The girl (or her stylist, not sure) just has taste coming out the wazoo. Lovely. Class, grace, beauty. Damn I wish I was her.
Anyhoo (word of day), I have never understood the appeal of Betsey Johnson. I just don't get her. I understand color and prints are fun, but she's just so gross that I can't get over it.
Speaking of gross (what a segue!), Britney was shopping there the other day and reportedly stormed in, grabbed some stuff, went to the dressing rooms where she stripped down to her pubes and stood around in plain view (which would be the reason I now have a pic). When the staff tried to "help" her (translation: get her fug ass covered up) she screamed at them and told them to 'fuck off.'
I wasn't sure I believed the story until I saw the photo, but there she is topless in a store with her nasty down-pointing nipples out for all to see. Someone please get this woman some help! The only thing I haven't seen on her body is her anus. I DON'T want to see that. Please.
[Pic source: Egotastic]
I think I can decidedly announce that I hate the entire Simpson clan. Jessica is annoying, although she looks fabulous occasionally, Joe is a creepy perv who obviously wacks off to his daughters and Asslee...oh Asslee.
Here she is on vacation with her douchebag boyfriend Pete Wentz. Seriously? You have sex with that guy? He flat irons his hair when you're on vacation BY THE POOL. Also, he must have some type of auto grease in that shit to keep it looking like that. Totally gross.
Anyhoo, I'm not sure if you can see, but her legs are totally bruised up and gross. Also, she has some serious underboob going on. Come on! Tuck in that shit so we don't all barf.
In conclusion (hee hee, essay-style) I think they're gross.
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Seriously. Especially Scary - she looks really bad here. That hair is not for her. Yucka.
Roberto Cavalli will design anything for anyone lately, H&M, these (fabulous) twats...Maybe he can make me a maxi dress for my Jamaican vacation.
I NEED to go see them. It will be a fabulous show. Anyone wanna buy me tickets?
Nicole Richie & Joel Madden had a baby this past weekend, as well as Christina Aguilera and Jordan Bratman.
Nic & Joel named their baby Harlow Winter Kate Madden (WINTER?) and Xtina and Jordy named their son Max Liron Bratman.